To determine whether or not to overturn the principal’s decision on junior Jim Stack’s idea of growing his hair out for Locks of Love, a charity that provides wigs to children with cancer, the school board plans to meet Monday at 7 to vote over the issue.
“Had I approved Jim’s request, then I would have students every day asking if they also could break the dress code,” principal Tonya King said.
The dress code states that male student’s hair must not be longer than collar-length and must be a natural color. After denying Stack’s request, King suggested another option.
“He could have a fundraiser and donate the money to the organization. I would be more than willing to help with the fundraiser,” King said.
In order for Stack to help out Locks of Love, he must grow his hair 10 inches long, which would take him between a year and 18 months.
“I hope the school board understands. I won’t be hurting anyone when my hair gets longer. I even agreed to tuck it into my shirt so it won’t be as noticeable.”
Stack applied earlier to be a donor. In addition, he experienced his 5-year-old sister lose all of her hair due to her chemotherapy treatment. Also, Locks of Love wrote a letter on Stack’s behalf to the school board.
“I hope the board approves my request. Donating my hair to Locks of Love is a very special project to me,” Stack said.
Each month, Locks of Love receives 200 requests from families who cannot afford a wig for their sick child, and every month they have to turn down about 150 of those requests.
” I was moved by Jim’s passion to donate his hair,” president of Locks of Love Gisel Roco said. ” We desperately need human hair for our wigs.”
A total of 350 students signed a letter written by the Student Council, which supports Shack’s project.
“Girls have long hair, and no one is distracted,” student council president Gilbert Castillo said. “Rules were made to be broken, and this is a very good reason to break one.”
The school board refused to comment on the issue before the meeting.
“We will discuss it at the board meeting next week,” school board president Bill Valdez said. “I will say that the letter was well-written and had some good points.”
Good things:
1: Good quote choices
2: Good up link with transitions and quotes.
3: Transitions help your paper flow.
Bad things:
1: Watch for just a little too much words on transitions.
2: Vary lengths of quotes.
3: Wordiness on transitions are common.
Good Things
1) You had good quotes
2) Very well written transitions
3) All around great story
Bad Things
1) You could have spaced out your paragraphs more but it’s not that big of a deal
2) You were a little biased but it’s hard not to with this story
3) You could shorten a little
By Stone Palmer
To determine whether or not to overturn the principal’s decision on junior Jim Stack’s idea of growing his hair out for Locks of Love, the school board plans to meet Monday at 7 to vote over the issue.
“Had I approved Jim’s request, then I would have students every day asking if they also could break the dress code,” principal of Leaguetown High School Tonya King said. DON’T NEED LEAGUETOWN HIGH SCHOOL. THEN YOU MAY JUST REFER TO “LOCKS OF LOVE” AS A CHARITY IN THE LEAD. THEN MENTION IN FIRST TRANSITION AND EXPLAIN WHAT THEY ARE.
The dress code states that male student’s hair must not be longer than collar-length and must be a natural color. Principal King still supports Stack’s idea however. INSTEAD OF THIS SECOND SENTENCE TRY SOMETHING LIKE “AFTER DENYING STACK’S REQUEST KING SUGGESTED ANOTHER OPTION.”
“He could have a fundraiser and donate the money to the organization. I would be more than willing to help with the fundraiser,” King said.
Stack applied earlier to be a donor. In addition, he experienced his 5-year-old sister lose all of her hair due to her chemotherapy treatment. YOU NEED TO INCLUDE THAT LOCKS OF LOVE WROTE A LETTER ON HIS BEHALF TO THE SCHOOL BOARD.
“I hope the board approves my request. Donating my hair to Locks of Love is a very special project to me,” Stack said.
A total of 350 students signed a letter written by the Student Council, which supports Shack’s project. GREAT.
“Girls have long hair, and no one is distracted,” student council president Gilbert Castillo said. “Rules were made to be broken, and this is a very good reason to break one.”
In order for Stack to help out Locks of Love, he must grow his hair 10 inches long, which would take him between a year and 18 months. THIS NEEDS TO GO HIGHER IN THE STORY. BUT, GOOD JOB HITTING THIS INFORMATION.
“I hope the school board understands. I won’t be hurting anyone when my hair gets longer. I even agreed to tuck it into my shirt so it won’t be as noticeable.”
The school board refused to comment on the issue before the meeting.
“We will discuss it at the board meeting next week. I will say that the letter was well-written and had some good points,” school board president Bill Valdez said.
Locks of Love provided the school board with a letter verifying that Stack had applied to be a donor and had his parent’s permission. Each month, Locks of Love receives 200 requests from families who cannot afford a wig for their sick child, and every month they have to turn down about 150 of those requests. THIS NEEDS TO BE HIGHER IN THE STORY AS WELL.
“I was moved by Jim’s passion to donate his hair,” president of Locks of Love Gisel Roco said. “We desperately need human hair for our wigs.”
REALLY GOOD JOB. YOU NEED TO REARRANGE A LITTLE. BUT, GREAT FIRST ATTEMPT.